On The Run


"Now where do I hide the cash?"
Coolville - population 534? Too noticeable.
Belpre of 6660?
Belle Prairie - there's a nice ring to it.

The original version, everyone, was way too creepy for me.

"Now where do I dump the body?"
Coolville - population 534? Too noticeable.
Belpre of 6660?
Belle Prairie - nice dumping place.


--------------------------------------------
Microfiction Mondays feature the shortest stories in tweetable 140 characters, or even fewer. Hosted weekly by Susan - it's a writers' playground!
Posted by at
Labels: ,

17 comments:

  1. Sylvia KAugust 29, 2010 at 5:48 PM

    Got to be careful where you hide the cash! What a fun take on the pic of the day! Terrific! Hope you have a great week!

    Sylvia

    ReplyDelete
  2. ninotazizAugust 29, 2010 at 6:41 PM

    Thanks Sylvia. The original was too creepy for me, so I changed it.

    Loved your mini-King.

    ReplyDelete
  3. SuzAugust 29, 2010 at 6:54 PM

    I actually liked the first one
    go for the edge!
    there is something creepy about that sign

    ReplyDelete
  4. ninotazizAugust 29, 2010 at 7:08 PM

    Suz,
    I can't believe I am afraid of my own writing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. KBAugust 29, 2010 at 7:09 PM

    They are both good but I like the second one. It is very creepy.

    Have a great week.

    My MM is here.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Michael G-GAugust 29, 2010 at 8:18 PM

    I'm another gruesome soul, who says go for creepy! (I wouldn't mind finding some stashed cash either, though!) Well done, on both accounts.

    Have a great week!

    ReplyDelete
  7. MorningAJAugust 29, 2010 at 11:29 PM

    I'd have gone with creepy. Though I like the idea of dumping it in Coolville. Good tale.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ellie GarrattAugust 29, 2010 at 11:58 PM

    I liked both of them, but especially the second. I'm a creepy kind of girl!

    Have a wonderful week x

    ReplyDelete
  9. anthonynorthAugust 30, 2010 at 12:41 AM

    Well I liked both :-)
    Nice ones.

    ReplyDelete
  10. PatAugust 30, 2010 at 6:44 AM

    Wow! Four letters changes it from robbery to homicide. Very clever. I like both.

    ReplyDelete
  11. BubbaAugust 30, 2010 at 7:24 AM

    I liked the original better - and who the heck buries cash anyway?

    ReplyDelete
  12. SouthLakesMomAugust 30, 2010 at 11:47 AM

    That's the beauty of West Virginia. Just pick a town, stash a body or two, jump back on the interstate and just keep moving...yeah, right. :-) Well done.

    ReplyDelete
  13. hopeAugust 30, 2010 at 3:12 PM

    They were both creative! Sure, the 1st one didn't make me wonder if anyone's making you angry. ;P

    ReplyDelete
  14. ninotazizAugust 30, 2010 at 5:28 PM

    Oh no! No way, Hope...this was pure fiction. Words that come out of the Jabberwockies of my mind!

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousAugust 31, 2010 at 5:40 AM

    Maybe you need to hide cash AND a body (of the person you took the cash from)! Good one this week. Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Susan at Stony RiverAugust 31, 2010 at 5:21 PM

    Yes, I'd much rather hide the cash and forget the body, than hide dead body full of cash LOL -- but what a wonderful glimpse of a larger story in this one, I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  17. AkelamaluSeptember 1, 2010 at 3:38 AM

    I like the second one - but that's because we both had murder on our minds this week! LOL

    Thanks for coming back and leaving me the link to your 55.

    ReplyDelete

Share with me your thoughts - and friendship !

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)
Related Posts with Thumbnails