abcda ecdbe fdbcf gbcdg
what goes around shall
come around to you
haunt some, enrich some
the life you lead
reflects you well
what goes around will
by rule of thumb
come around to bid
farewell, makes sure you
recognize it still
what goes around
like a little weed
grows straight and true
you wonder, how come
it never stays down
like a karousel
what goes around will do
that to you, it never succumbs
the life you lead
encircles you well
abcda ecdbe fdbcf gbcdg
by ninotaziz. all rights reserved
__________________________
For d'Verse : form for all
A Special thank you to Mr David James for introducing
the Karousel and Weave forms.
A Special thank you to Mr David James for introducing
the Karousel and Weave forms.
I really like this..had thought there was a way to do this but couldn't think of it myself ;)
ReplyDeleteDear Katy,
DeleteI loved your blog and thank you for being here. Reading your blog, you have been blessed. I will certainly drop by again.
nothing like good old Karma
ReplyDeletequantum kisses
Very true, Tammy!
Deleteha i like that you included the karousel in your poem...and what comes around will certainly go around...smiles.
ReplyDeleteYes Brian, I decided to go with the spelling too, though the spell check insisted I changed it to carousel! Ha Ha! Death to spell checks today.
DeleteVery clever. Like that you used the thing itself as the subject as well as the form - seems to have kept it all continually moving. Well done to both form and content. Very enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteThank you Gay! I liked the prompt very much. The idea stuck and I just had to follow it through.
DeleteLoved your introduction to David James.
What goes around comes around...I like the circle of thoughts and form in your offering ~
ReplyDeleteYes, what goes around does come around, Grace. It is a teaching that bear repeating, right?
Delete*that bears repeating...
Delete...very wonderful ma'am... it rings truth... it could hear this in a round song... it's the same by saying what goes up must come down... And that everything a person thinks or do has an equivalent reaction...i enjoyed it...smiles...
ReplyDelete..Oops..*i could hear... not 'it'... Wrongly spelled...lol...smiles...
DeleteDear Kelvin,
DeleteNot to worry...thank you for your words. I enjoyed this prompt and introduction of style by dVerse - I will surely try it again.
Your own poetry is very haunting Kelvin, and very well done.
I am quite sure the bird in the forest will not die there with no one in the know.
I just knew there had to be a way of doing this - and you found it.
ReplyDeleteJust a small thing, but in the second stanza, fourth line "make sure you do// recognise it" I think the word 'do' could be removed, which would improve the rhythm (I stumbled on it) and retain the sense. Of course, if you meant to emphasis 'do' then it should stay.
Tony
Thanks Tony! I was so bent on the form, I failed to notice that you//recognise it would still be in form.
DeleteI am one of those who do not mind feedback at all, so thank you for suggesting that.
nice...the going around..the carousel..the things coming back on us...like that you picked up the karousel theme within the poem
ReplyDeleteThanks Claudia! I am looking forward to the next topic on dVerse. I will try some French and Malay.
ReplyDeleteStrangely, though I am Malay, I only learnt Malay when I was six, I spoke Australian English until then...
It is a beautiful and ancient language, our manuscripts date from the 15th century.
I'm with Claudia... your theme is perfect for the form... love it!
ReplyDeleteThanks Laurie! It was an interesting form, wasn't it?
ReplyDelete